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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">时间:$ N" ]) s6 z2 K! z1 J5 {
mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">20149 [2 X5 o4 Z) p" X4 s. ~mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">年8月12日
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">地点:- Q; |' P( q' c5 D8 c9 Emso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">老秘网“文稿修改演播室”(QQ群号:366351120)
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">主讲:" ~. i+ `, T0 j+ ?7 d8 Dmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">整理:, x; f [- T" Y7 Kmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">杨苏
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">一、对一篇汇报材料的讨论
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font-family:黑体;mso-hansi-font-family:黑体;mso-bidi-font-family:黑体">老猫:某市美丽乡村创建工作情况汇报,大家帮某同学推敲一组标题,如何?
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"Times New Roman"">(一)立足转型强村,打造宜业乡村。
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( w& H, h( V0 |line-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">/ h* F7 o2 S/ h7 d! e* m. ^: {6 H"Times New Roman"">(二)坚持“五水共治”,打造宜人乡村
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"Times New Roman"">(三)着眼增收致富,打造宜农乡村。
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"Times New Roman"">(四)突出民生保障,打造宜居乡村。
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mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">魅力乡村,幸福乡村、宜居乡村、富裕乡村之类的,我的意思是用一根线串起来,让这组小标题形成一个整体。/ F$ G: s4 ?) Y8 Z0 h1 T/ @" ]
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">标题分两部分,前半部分亮手段(做法),后半部分凸显成效。四个乡村的思路不错,但内容上缺少支撑,建议再从内容上面抓取下逻辑。另外,感觉题目不足以体现内容。( g/ r p: Z9 g6 X* S1 v7 Bmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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+ k7 p" S" k" f. M6 i楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">胡晓斌:: h/ B/ j' i* _& U
mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯,内容来讲有并列的,也有逻辑递进关系,不知如何把握。# p) ?# u1 P' Z
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">猫老:. a4 T; n; c3 V1 q6 Bmso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">富增收入,美展新颜。. }1 a6 x( q% F: o4 j! l# v9 o( Pmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">民生保障作为出发点,惠农增收作为增长点呢5 b" _1 E7 i! M0 r9 X
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">顺序调整一下,环境放最后。不知道第一点内容。6 f: { K: R- A# t! G
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">整个提纲是这样子的:9 `: K; u8 _6 C) \0 a1 p6 t
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宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">一、三任书记接力干,一张蓝图抓创建2 ]2 R% c) o D7 Sfont-family:宋体;mso-fareast-font-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;1 v. W) I& x+ Q) B/ s
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宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">二、十年时间抓整治,美丽乡村显成效8 Q# M4 _+ S4 H; t: K' Nfont-family:宋体;mso-fareast-font-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;0 e4 j6 u4 v4 Z0 U0 W
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line-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">2 C' ?8 B0 ]; k* f" D) s6 i7 m! W宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">(一)坚持把转型强村作为美丽乡村建设的& B: Q; _7 D ~font-family:宋体;mso-fareast-font-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;, a1 f7 j, _2 ^4 z5 o. @
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">,乡村发展水平有效提升。% i J* P; k1 ^# S# ]font-family:宋体;mso-fareast-font-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;
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宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">、依靠主体强动力。% O D% T& w' n! } ofont-family:宋体;mso-fareast-font-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;5 k# t: o7 X; K0 K" l2 U
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line-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">& W }) K' M1 d7 X仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt"> 2 x7 D* S2 ~2 W( t# N% \宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">、产村联动促增收。. z, L, S% i, C' m' L9 D! Y! t( d
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">产村联动促增收。坚持建设与发展并重,因地制宜做到美丽乡村建设与产业项目发展并举。一是整合特色产业。根据不同的区位优势、产业基础和发展趋势,规划产业布局,整合产业资源,大力发展专业市场,壮大村集体经济。如古山镇大园东村依托发达的废旧钢铁产业,引导周边5 ~* k# y6 y! O' i: R( `+ }
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3 r! t2 Q! l* ^# W5 n, m楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">胡晓斌/ S, h4 q8 s. _3 ~2 | G- imso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">:一般正文里不用一是二是三是的吗?9 x3 Z, ?/ F8 z# x7 qmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">用是可以用,问题不在这里。这个材料感觉像是工作总结,挂了个美丽乡村的头,较牵强。8 Q0 |3 B: q6 [7 G0 wmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">那没有,美丽乡村建设也包括这些内容的,而不仅仅是村庄整治。4 q u F9 L9 o: _+ |mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">我不是这个意思,美丽乡村汇报也好,生态乡村汇报也好,这些内容都可以用。一个汇报材料第一是基本情况,第二是对于创建活动本身的相关情况汇报,第三是做法,第四适当点点问题。当然,问题也可以根据实际情况不点。至于你的措施,应该是结合本情况来的。而且此提纲里,做法没有必要分这么多层次,容易造成逻辑上的混乱。你先要明确出这么几个重点。比如,要说转型,你想表达的转型是什么转型,怎么转型,转出什么成效,结合美丽乡村落到优化产业结构上比较好。# ^7 j7 n e# @" f1 {! j8 i& Gmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">我内容太多了是嘛?: e2 j* j ~/ E. e! s6 Omso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">不是多,是乱了。我看完的体会是包罗万象,但具体内容看完却记不住多少。 Y X! t0 a! r: k# W* _" U
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">飘雪:7 g/ v Q0 B |7 j$ \mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">层次可以简化,什么都想说,太杂了。7 a2 w9 ?" [3 f/ `# R% e: P
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">不过不是不能说,要理顺一下。举个例子来说,就用猫总凝练的题目(一)坚持把转型强村作为美丽乡村建设的; G% J* H3 v7 Z: }5 w$ `. \) Omso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">“3 g# v0 i1 U% K14.0pt;font-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:
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. W5 y# q$ @5 l8 |0 K$ @6 C# Z K宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">,乡村发展水平有效提升。这个标题要写,要明确围绕的中心是转型强村。效果是乡村发展水平。对应转型强村找内容。! u- Z2 N2 D; N" Gmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">号同学你这是典型的观点加事迹的写法,要把材料融会贯通,并从中提炼观点。' V. w- B9 Y1 d% b+ c- h8 Pmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">我发表一下个人的想法,有以下几个方面的建议:一是老秘并不了解学员工作的具体环境和具体情况,如果要这样一对一的修改,是需要花费一些时间慢慢对接的;二是就本文来说存在一些逻辑问题,可能是在撰稿之初就犯了一些逻辑性错误,观点(小标题)是根据内容提炼出来的,而本文的小标题对仗工整,乍一看给人的感觉是比较好,但一看内容就有点文不对题了。例如:第一部分,作为乡级政府谈何政策支持?乡镇有制定政策的权限吗?: e3 r) w8 U' O, l
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">我们是县级市,不是乡镇。* _' \$ ], W8 E0 S9 E6 F
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">县级,包括地市级都没有制定政策的权限,都是贯彻落实上级的政策。此外,从文章的提纲看,二级标题不能囊括内容。) N+ K2 e" @; I* I2 Lmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对,这个问题我同意。而且这也不是核心问题。核心问题可能还是逻辑架构上。我觉得晓斌对转型可能没有理解透。6 S, J V, j- e: p
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">石子云:" a0 g& Z& P$ U* T+ vmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">@39# Y' n. B) w# T& q( Omso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">号同学胡晓斌3 a1 Z! E1 i I; G' M- f+ [mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">——剖析材料的写法。/ n( B. T' i8 wmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这篇六大点,有点多,整合下。 s+ C: ~& S# \7 F8 r
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2 ^6 L3 D% w6 s9 Ymso-font-kerning:0pt">二、列提纲、明思路) i9 x$ r8 d q" [ a: f7 k% A) s5 t14.0pt;font-family:楷体_GB2312;mso-hansi-font-family:楷体_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:7 S; |" K$ T' z1 E- L
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">在刚才讨论的基础上,我想谈一谈关于列提纲的一点体会。我所理解的提纲就是动笔之前想好的内容,材料的骨架,也是我们通常所说的谋篇布局。) c3 i3 Q C, U7 T ]
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! E6 b1 }- j1 h; u ^; _3 ?- o楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方:如果反过来,写加强社区制度建设,对93向社区制度进行梳理,非常平,看不出什么特色与亮点来。
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5 x# h% N2 ], {. L* t7 K楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">铁树凝:需求为王,刨树刨根,循此,深挖,梳理片段,轮廓,佐以素材,碰撞,修正思路,揉融观点素材,思路为纲,纲举目张,终是符合有关要求,才算好。
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">飘雪:总之写作很难,难在何处,之一是思维。
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9 J5 ^5 j& x3 F" s4 g楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">铁树凝:难在先方有可贵后生!思路素材之间有一碰撞修正过程不是一成不变的,中间很多时候有变化。
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$ g: a4 M! J; h3 q* M楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">老猫:好标题的灵感从哪里来?老猫的体会是从段落内容中提炼,从个别字词中联想,从上级文件中生发,从参考资料中化用,从交流碰撞中偶得。